Matty Rain was scheduled to get laid last night

[kato]

you got this matty

gl

 

[Matty]

Tomorrow night, pending the recovery of her swollen eye. That girl is not subtle. Damn.

Boys, #8 is on deck.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

 

[fiveteamer]

How does this guy do it boyyysss

must be the coke can

 

[Matty]

BTW Fiver you met Chunky Chick briefly on Sat. Was she not huge? You may not have paid enough attention, too busy talking about pie crusts.

 

[Oksana]

Please PM me, Facebook me and send out the carrier pigeons when Matty posts a photo of the Coke Can Cock next to an actual Coke can.

I feel it's going to happen any day but I can't rely on myself not to miss it.

 

[Matty]

I do like to overshare. Not as much as Five "I can't believe you don't like to eat ass" Teamer but I'm up there.

Will keep you posted.

(No.)

 

[fiveteamer]

BTW Fiver you met Chunky Chick briefly on Sat. Was she not huge? You may not have paid enough attention, too busy talking about pie crusts.

I wonder if they ever did make that pie?

 

[roguejuror]

was she really a fatty dragon fivey?

 

[reno cool]

BTW Fiver you met Chunky Chick briefly on Sat. Was she not huge? You may not have paid enough attention, too busy talking about pie crusts.

What a seen that must have been.

 

[Matty]

I wish I woulda recorded the conversations that took place that night. Fiver is a showman.

He may have blown whatever shot he had at landing my roommate though.

 

[fiveteamer]

I think she may be a bit of a French prude. If you can't handle a little ass eating conversation then GTFO.

I apologized beforehand for whatever I was about to say, That should absolve me of anything.

 

[Matty]

She's not French, just your average Ontarian that was raised a bit too properly.

 

[RayRay]

the early apology should always get you a pass, at least once...fawk that broad if she cant handle the conversation...did she act like she never had a guy sneak a tongue in her fart box before? if so, she is lying!

 

[CASPERWAIT$]

I am making a movie out of this thread. This has Judd Apatow written all over it.

 

[fiveteamer]

Every time I've met her so far I've asked her where she's from, I keep forgetting. She should just say 'Montreal' next time.

It's always small talk like

Me: "Where are you from again, Montreal?"

Her: "No, I'm from...." See fuck I forgot again.

Matty don't leave us in the room alone together again I'm terrible at small talk.

 

[Matty]

I told you to come walk Pogo with me to sober up you fok. I knew she sucked at small talk too and she's always mumbling. I gave you an out and you declined.

Suffer.

 

[roguejuror]

did she act like she never had a guy sneak a tongue in her fart box before? if so, she is lying!

it might be true, you never know. there;s some really boring people out there.

 

[fiveteamer]

She seems like the type that has sex with the lights off, if she even has sex