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How Many Posters Have Been In A Paddy Wagon Or Been To Jail?

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Polaroid
You did something and someone tried to pick you out or you were the hired help to make up the numbers?
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In college, I had to report my roommate missing after a long night of drinking, so I called 911. When the cop showed up to get the info on my roommate, he brought me down to the station because I fit the description of someone who threw a brick through a bar window.
 
jail

Wow, some good stuff here.

Extremely well played Cougar. Bread you are an animal for what you did in yours and I'm actually a little scared of you now.

RS, Congrats on living through that holy crap.

I thought of a good one. One of my best friends growing up, you might enjoy the ending.

So, we did a lot of acid in late high school and college years. Anyway, one Friday night, a few of my friends were doing some, me and my buddy Scott were sitting out on the drugs because we both had to work early the next day.

So anyway we head over there to hang out for a bit, and they had dropped about a half hour earlier. The one guy was acting all sketched out so we were having fun with him with this magnet that looked like a bug, he would scream "get that way from me!" then wouldn't remember it 30 seconds later so we would repeat.

So we went out on the beach to play some football. Trust me this gets a lot better.

Raph continued to get more freaked out. So anyway, Scott and I go home.

I'm at work the next day and a couple of them come and ask me to take a break.

The story goes as follows.

Soon after Scott and I left, Raph got a lot worse. Took all his clothes off and started walking around his house saying "I am the beastmaster" over and over again. he woke his Mom up and, naked, was threatening to choke her or something, not a violent guy normally at all.

The the dawn hours came and a worker was out on the beach in equipment moving sand. Raphael goes outside, still naked, and, being an excellent sprinter in high school sprints full speed at the machine screaming at the guy, "You're not going to make this place part of the system, etc. etc."

The guy runs away and Raph chases him for awhile then goes back and gets in te machine and starts trying to work it.

Soon after, he is arrested by the police. completely violent, takes a dump in the back of the car screaming about how they are fucking pigs, etc. etc.

The worker evetually did not press charges and after a short stint in the insane ward Raph was let go.

He is now an attorney and likely makes more money than you do.
 
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fiveteamer
lots of winners in this thread
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coke-mexican.jpg


:pipe:
 
RogueScholar
Yeppers, Mrs. X.
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I have the time to write since I'm seriously procrastinating cleaning up the biohazard that used to be our bedroom. Finally, the lesbian story.

When I was 22 or 23 I had my heart broken by a douchebag for what I determined to be the last time. I was turning gay. I had lots of friends that were gay and was always telling them that I was switching teams. They all told me, no, sorry, you're not gay. The conversation, usually drunken would degenerate to "yes I am", "no you're not", "yes I am". So shortly after the "douchebag" incident I was hanging out at a coffee house that I frequented. There was a girl there that was always shamelessly flirting with me and blatantly hitting on me. It was funny and fun, but it was obvious that she was serious. We would always talk about school and music and hang out with a group of friends that pretty much lived at the place. She was flirting with me as usual, but this time I said, okay, lets go. She was like "really! Awesome, we'll go get some drinks and go back to your place. The only thing is, you have to drop me off at school tomorrow" I said "no problem".

This is the part where people get mad. They want sexy details, and all I'm going to say, the alcohol was consumed, the act was committed and the alarm was set.

We woke up in the morning, jumped in the car and she gave me directions to "school". School was not the local community college as she had led me to believe by the omission of key details, the school was the local community high school.

She was 17.

Can you imagine how I felt dropping her off at the front door in the line of cars filled with moms and their kids jumping out of the passenger side door. Talk about a walk of illegal shame.
 
I guess I can start at the begining:

Only been in a paddy wagon once but, I was brought in when I was 17 for banging my girlfriend in the lifeguard stand at the beach in Ft. Lauderdale on night. Both of our parents had to come pick us up. It wasn't too bad for me, but as my dad told me,"I hope you weren't really attached to that girl, because I'm quite sure her father will not approve of you any more." He was right.

The time I was in a paddy wagon is when I got wasted at New Years eve party in Time Square, and the coppers tossed me and the old lady in the paddy wagon for a trip to the station house for a cooling off period, no charge.

Then I got picked up on a DUI stop in Virginia. I was sober, but had about 25 Corona bottles in the back of the car because we were in a Federal park and didn't want to toss them out. They didn't get me on DUI, but I did have a gram of coke on me that they found. Then they tried to toss the book at me, but my lawyer got me off on an improper search of my car after I passed the drunk test.

Then the last time, we sere crossing the border in Buffalo, and the old lady was hammer'd up after drinking the entire time we were traveling. All they did is hold us in the cell until they couldn't handle her bithen any more and let us go. I actually wanted to spend the night in jail that time, because she was really a handful that day.
 
Mrs. X
I have the time to write since I'm seriously procrastinating cleaning up the biohazard that used to be our bedroom. Finally, the lesbian story.

When I was 22 or 23 I had my heart broken by a douchebag for what I determined to be the last time. I was turning gay. I had lots of friends that were gay and was always telling them that I was switching teams. They all told me, no, sorry, you're not gay. The conversation, usually drunken would degenerate to "yes I am", "no you're not", "yes I am". So shortly after the "douchebag" incident I was hanging out at a coffee house that I frequented. There was a girl there that was always shamelessly flirting with me and blatantly hitting on me. It was funny and fun, but it was obvious that she was serious. We would always talk about school and music and hang out with a group of friends that pretty much lived at the place. She was flirting with me as usual, but this time I said, okay, lets go. She was like "really! Awesome, we'll go get some drinks and go back to your place. The only thing is, you have to drop me off at school tomorrow" I said "no problem".

This is the part where people get mad. They want sexy details, and all I'm going to say, the alcohol was consumed, the act was committed and the alarm was set.

We woke up in the morning, jumped in the car and she gave me directions to "school". School was not the local community college as she had led me to believe by the omission of key details, the school was the local community high school.

She was 17.

Can you imagine how I felt dropping her off at the front door in the line of cars filled with moms and their kids jumping out of the passenger side door. Talk about a walk of illegal shame.
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wow.
 
RageWizard
Then the last time, we sere crossing the border in Buffalo, and the old lady was hammer'd up after drinking the entire time we were traveling. All they did is hold us in the cell until they couldn't handle her bithen any more and let us go. I actually wanted to spend the night in jail that time, because she was really a handful that day.
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ex-mennonites kick ass
 
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