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Thread where Steves rambles about life

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So, what I view as the secret to music and poker is play weak then surprise you're strong as fuck.

So last night I was in this bar that I was going to play either solo or with my potential bandmate. I order a bucket of beer. I'm crushing them, enjoying Lebron and some fat guy decides to pick on me. I let him do it, let him do it, let him do it. Looking like I really want him to stop but the whole time I know what coming so I'm trying not to laugh. He apologizes (fake) then follows me into the bathroom and talks more shit. So I stand up tall and say you wanna throw a punch right now you fat bitch? And yeah I got people for your people. He almost pisses his pants then when we go back to the bar he's basically crying complaining to the waitress. She chucks me because they're regs and I'm not.

Sorry fat bitch, you picked on the wrong fucking guy.

So yeah I'm not allowed there anymore and now I have to explain that to my potential band mate.

The reason I did that is because if you're gonna pick on people (which I don't) you're better be prepared to back it the fuck up.

He wasn't.

Also I met 2 really hot girls so that's much cooler. One totally taken and no I'm not fucking with that guy. One not taken and we exchanged I love you's.

That's much cooler then having to put down a mouthy fat guy.

So yeah drink less, stay the fuck out of fights and enjoy the pretties.

I see music and poker exactly like this actually.


Darn it I liked the one girl at that bar. She told us where she lives and parties but I don't fucking remember. Maybe my roomie/potential bandmate knows. I think she is taken but she did give me the sexy hand on the shoulder as she left.

They keep telling me where to chill with them and I keep fucking forgetting.

I guess that's pretty. Fucking. Funny.

And fucki you Blitty I know you read this and just laughed your ass off.

I am as I type it.

Not fuck you but fuck me me.

Wtf was all that shit.

Steve - LISTEN TO THE WOMEN. AND TRY, REALLY TRY TO REMEMBER WHAT THEY TELL YOU.

 
Alright all of the apologies to all of the people I pissed off yesterday have been made. The shop that had the gay guy that was interested in me and I was too much of a dick. Yep, in person apology. The shop with the TAKEN girl I threw this line at. Can't find the exact link right now but it's just like this. It goes - do you think I'm sexy? Then as she's thinking about it you throw yourself on the ground. She did love it but her BOYFRIEND didn't. Apology.


The bi girl that I pissed off by ripping on the gay dude. Are you kidding me? I'm a lesbo porn junkie. She made me REALLY apologize and rightly so. I can't believe I hurt her feeling at all. She's absolutely incredible.

The bar I can't go back, they threatened the heat. I got too serious on that guy. I'll probably have a friend tell them I am very sorry and that should be ok. No I'm not putting anyone out of business. #idiot #dellusionsofgrandeur #sorry #:hattip: Blitty, Matty, Casp, Bonebone, Cali, Quincy, - I need you to walk in there together and tell them STEVE is SORRY.

Matty might have been briefly proud of me starting control of the jukebox with this.


THEY WERE JUST TRYING TO LISTEN TO SKYNYRD AND CHILL.

Damn Steve. You can't control every environment you're in.

So now, we can move forward.

Guys, being completely fucking insane is more complicated than you think.

Phew.
 
Was the deep into the eyes glare at me and shut the fuck up and apologize to the bi girl letting me know that I might get owned? Because regardless I could NEVER hurt those eyes again, ever. Either way I got fucking housed there. If I end up working there she can put me on a leash and make me sweep the floors with a toothbrush.

I'm thinking about that whole situation and I have to be honest.

I'm pretty FUCKING turned on.

Baby I would do ANYTHING for you, always.

It's probably just my paranoia again but if it's something more than that then my answer is a very quick

YES.

I have to play that very, very smooth.

Steves has been good at playing hard, not smooth.

Hmm.
 
So, the second job is actually very complicated but cool as fuck. Hi, I'm Steve and I'm a remote recruiter for a trucking company. If anyone ever needs a trucking job anywhere in the United States, I'm your guy. I can split the commish with you - in cash (WU/MG). Still keeping the cleaning service job sales job for now, it's just fucking hard. But it's up my sleeve for now and I predict it'll stay that way. They're just happy if anyone closes even one, so when I'm not busy sure we can bump it up with that. If anyone that is a general manager of a restaurant in Florida is not happy with their cleaning service, I'm your guy. I can split the commish with you in cash, same methods. Had a guy from a sales company say to me today "you're a gambling man, no thanks". They're afraid of a hit and run and so that's a completely understandable position. To be honest I didn't feel like taking 3 trains each way for whatever an hour so we both won there. Mutual respect. Well at least respect from me, anyway.

So today we go to a casino and close out a box. It's going to hurt, badly. I miss them very, very badly. But it's on me. 100% on me. Drinking all that to hide from the pain about my Mother. About law troubles. Hey man, I'm too hungover - here's $100 for a $30 bottle because I hate myself for not being able to see my Mother right now so I want you to be happy because I know I won't be. Again. And again. And again. Hey man, I missed my train back home and I'm stuck here for the next 5 hours so can I pay you $100 to protect me. Again. And again. Can you drive me here - here's $100 for a $40 job. Again, and again, and again. I really didn't even lose in poker. I gave it all away trying to escape pain with obnoxious amounts of alcohol and trying to keep a good vibe. You get one or two users two who start begging for shit because they see what they see as a mark. They're put the fuck away from me - and I pray for both of our sakes for good or they will be for real real good and no one will be happy about that outcome. But I am in position there and they sure as fuck know it. We almost got into a real nasty fist fight that would not have been good for anyone. But we agreed to disagree and I actually kinda feel bad for him. Just like the fat guy in the bar, you fucked with the wring motherfucker. But this dude is not fat. He just knows what happens if he does anything. So I consider it taken care of. Got a new hottie that helped me position myself for all that. I'm gonna see her after I clean out the box. She looked out for me before she got anything from me. That's exactly waddup, gorgeous. Ima take good care of you, like I promised. It was like she's heard about me but I don't know that she has. She's just that fucking smart, cool and sexy. So that's something to look forward to, seeing her again. You have to stop and smell the flowers because they are beautiful and they can protect you. And that's incredible. Just incredible.

Right now the job in this one store is my one lean with the other two because that dude is very, very real and he gets me 100%. Still pretty interested in that shortie as well so maybe, maybe.

For now we continue to position, position. Like I said - 1, 2 maybe 3 jobs then we pour poker on top of it when we're positioned for that and then I can make as much as my Brother, and that's about fitting in with them - not competition. We already did that - beach vball partners then playing against each other, blocking the crap out of each other, etc. etc. but the thing is - he's the whole reason me even touching a volleyball even happened at all. All the girls, all the great times. Never ever again would I hurt him in any way even for a second. Just wanna make a bunch of green, give his kids a bunch of cool stuff and catch up with them and the rest of the fam. How is the one kid so good at hockey and computers. Hey bro let me teach him poker. Ok let's wait til he'r 21, lol. or til never. I want to but yeah - that's be a quick no because college for him - yes. How are the other two so good at dancing. Etc. etc. Mom how are you. What do you need right now besides a 2 minute hug with tears both ways. Let me cook you lunch right now. Dad you're cool. Sorry, sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Tell me another Steve Martin joke, please. And hopefully thank you.

So, this is how it goes. It's hard at times, it really is. I was used to playing poker all the time and being drunk or hungover literally all the time. Haven't drank hard stuff in a bit now and feeling much better. Detox got hard as fuck it really did. Thought I was going to have a HA. Or a S. Kicked smoking too thanks to the hotties at the casino too. Coughed up white shit for like 4 days straight. Again the hotties were right.

That stuff about Mac Miller really got under my skin. This, is genius. I don't hate Adriana at all and I understand her position. I just need my boy from far to be alright.


Be safe Mac. Thanks for staying here with us man.

Thank you.
 
Sorry about the spelling errors guys. Still detoxing a little and watching training videos for a job literally right now, and I promised the boys an original for the jam on Tuesday which will come around. It's a cool intro so far.

Caleb has his own little house to get away from everyone/everything and write Grammy stuff. I don't which complicates things. But we'll get there.

Tried to cover this today. Didn't go well, lol.

:bowdown:


Got back to this. That went well and it'll only get better.


Thank you, Reno.

:hattip:

Love all of you very much.
 
And it was soooooooooooo sad teling poker goodbye this morning. I really wanted to get it done and I was pretty drunk so the people at the grocery are so damn cool that they let me just kind of stumble around for an hour there since I just needed to get out of the house. Then I took the 530 train to Philly. The host at the time was so deeply cool as he always is, shook my hand because he understands that I'm going some high level stuff and I think he's a big reason why everyone was so supportive. I told my favorite dealer and she was so cool as she always is. This Asian guy who I joked around a lot with was very funny, "what's that got to do with her?" We shared a laugh and I told him I'll see him out, then walked out and literally sobbed. I couldn't hold it in. That is family, not just a poker room, and I'll miss them so deeply. They taught me so much about everything and they always, always just wanted to help. We'll get back there but we have to do it the right way. I then started losing my buzz so I asked some guy where there was a bottle shop and that fucker lied to me to make five bucks. It's on me I guess for being an alky.


I stumbled around, more just like fuck it I'm not going to be around here for awhile so let's see what's up. Had a delicious bagel from a nice little place in Chinatown. Had a nice laugh with one dude when I was like "where the fuck am I?", they were laughing with and at me. My phone was about to die but I saw that I had stumbled like an hour and a half the wrong way and I shared a laugh with some dude "how the fuck do I get back to the casino?". Well, hi durr - it's Philly and the trains are everywhere. So a cool homie gave me directions to the train and I gave him a buck, that's how it works. Kind of hit on but more testing my chops on: two college girls who giggled quite a bit at "am I out of your league?". Another one at Subway at the train station. Me: Where' is Market....do you have a boyfriend? Her: What Street? Me: Do you have a boyfriend? Her: Yes I have a boyfriend. Me: Well then have a good day. We shared a smile and that was cool. This blonde at the station I thought was checking me out so I dropped the "sorry I'm out of your league" line on her. I was WRONG. She was NOT checking me out and looked at me like what the fuck? Mental note - not all girls are going to appreciate some guy twice their age laying game to them. But ask me if I give a shit, and I'll tell you I do not. Got home and was so fucking tired, lost my buzz. Passed out for a bit then went to the grocery store armed with my phone number for a girl that said when she finally gets a day off she would like to chill. So that should be a win and I will treat her right. I make you dinner, we Netflix and chill and do what you want to do. I find her deeply cool. She's always there working her beautiful ass off, and one day when I came in there looking so sad because I was having massive anxiety attacks about my Mother, she so softly looked into my eyes like she wanted to be there with me and heal whatever was wrong. She does like the KOL tat and one day I was like "dammit I have to adult today' an she goes "oh no!" - that shit is gold record material. So that should be cool. I plan on giving my number to her, the blonde vape store that owned me ("sorry, sorry" lol) and the bartender. Then it's on them. I like that approach. No pressure for them, ever. The point is to make them feel as incredible as they are.

Got my first application for the new job today, getting through that. This stuff is complex man, but the commission structure is so damn sexy, and my boss is cool as heck. I do still think the two jobs could be a nice one two punch but those cold calls hurt like fuck man. We should have a few possible out of the house daytime jobs that should be calling in the next couple day or two. The recruiter job is clearly the best option right now though and to be honest, it's a cool title to have as well.

Anyway, back to it.
 
Actually I'm incredibly excited about the recruiting job now because I can see it how I see music but in a different way. With music, you are filling peoples' hearts with love (hopefully), giving them energy if they need it and inspiring them. With recruiting, you are bettering their lives. Money. Food on the table. Rent/mtg payment - paid. Got kids? They eat. Got alimony? It's paid. Want a hooker, some blow, some whiskey and some clowns? Done. Lesbo orgy in your shower? Done. What's even cool is if it comes to it and one of them needs a house I can toss that to one of my mortgage friends.

I'm all about the love, yo. And nothing against poker, I will be back to it eventually, but it's so nice to help people. It's so nice to do it and in life, eventually you need people to help you.

Pretty excited now that we're hitting the ground running on this thing, I must say.

Weeeeeeeeee.
 
Job's poppin. First jam with the boys, it's awesome. They're so much better than I am. No covers. All improv. Now Stevie has to play barre progressions for 20 minutes at a time instead of the 4 minutes he's used to trying to play his covers. Normal pentatonic soloing is no longer acceptable either as they have us all over the fretboard.

Stevie sucks and had no idea :lmao:
:facepalm:

Wait til those West Chester girls get a load of Stevie after a month or two of this.

Might be more then a quick finger jam up the ass (which is still FUCKING hysterical) this time.

Well alright.
 
The cashier is single. I started a joke about a sex change operation I didn't have and she wasn't having it - right into my eyes very softly demanding me to listen to real talk. I apologized to her and told her the truth - on top of recruiting I am training to be a front man and guys like us are usually a LITTLE over the top because in rock and roll the audience has to be captivated by wondering what's going to happen next. I asked her for a piece of paper and a pen and flipped her my phone number. I told her I would never get her into trouble (in reality I'd take a bullet for her or anyone else in my crew - I've been dead before and I'm not afraid of that or pain). I listened to her complain about how sick she is and she was so beautiful even doing that - I want to play her silly songs and feed her and get her to feeling alright. And so the other ones have been taking their time, playing games which I respect. But you know the truth is since Cami I've flirted A LOT but I've been pretty lonely in the female department. So, this girl is that cool and she is COMPLETELY not threatening at all. My one mistake was telling her to contact me if she wants to hang out. I should have said if you want to talk feel free to text because honestly, I want to know is she is feeling alright and if she isn't, what I can do. I did finish strong though - I told her threaflu day and night, chicken soup and most importantly hydration.

The silly songs can wait.

And so - early bird gets the Stevie and Stevie is not about a quick screw or anything like that - Stevie wants someone soft to make feel alright and who deeply can make Stevie alright when his soul hurts. I told you guys about how she softly looked into my eyes the first time we met, like an angel telling me with no words that everything is going to be ok.

When I hear from her, she wins - I mean if she wants to of course.

And so that could be pretty cool.

I'm also very happy about my little crew of cool people in other facets - the musicians, the peeps - all of them. Very happy about that. I really haven't felt cared for this much since the Jersey crew. And that's super dope.
 
Good idea - playing a bunch of old Beck tunes loud yesterday because my lead guitarist and bass player said I'm alright and they are fucking incredible. Alright is a start.

Bad idea - chain smoking Marlboro Reds to show how everyone how tough I am.

Cough.

Sincerely, Steves the Fucktard
 
No one's gonna believe me but it's actually true -

If your diet consists of food and liquids instead of JUST MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF ALCOHOL

YOU'RE PROBABLY GOING TO FEEL JUST A LITTLE BETTER.

IT'S TRUE. YOU CAN DRINK WITHOUT DRINKING EVERYTHING IN SIGHT.

WOW.

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

WOW.

:highfive:
 
I'm actually coming up with my own stuff thanks to this guy.

1) Just walk around saying slightly loud "YEAH, BOY". Then when they look up like what in the the actual fuck 'oh I'm sorry did I say that out loud" apologize and attempt to converse. That's for a group of them.

2) This is for a single one. "Thank you". "For what?" Me: "Life can get annoying sometimes and it's just nice to look up and see something so pretty and heart warming. Thank you for taking the edge off".

3) For a group. Look at phone and slam water bottle on the ground. "They just told me the sex change operation is off. I'm sorry but I know I'm a 22 year old woman deep inside. Sorry, Just a little emotional right now. Where did my water go. Sorry."
 
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