Steves gets his life together

[Archie]

The drinking is terrible and will continue to ruin steves' life and/or kill him eventually if he doesn't stop. But can he stop drinking without getting his brain sorted out. I sorta assumed that the drinking was a coping mechanism, but maybe you're right. Or maybe it's both.

The internet seems to think that bipolar can trigger alcoholism and that drinking can trigger bipolar. Or possibly the same brain chemistry that leads to bipolar disorder also makes one susceptible to alcoholism. Fun.

yeah with comorbidities of substance abuse and mental illness it's cyclical and at some point what came first ceases to matter as they work in a ying and a yang to support one another. The chicken and egg no longer matter, because it just becomes a fried egg on fried chicken sammie situation.

no situations are identical, there are an infinite range of triggers and etiologies some more biological and some more sociological but near the bottom the worst cases all find shockingly similar environmental situations which then become a new co-vehicle along with the biological dependence and mental illness.

that environment can look different but will mostly contain in some forms: social isolation, regular threats or acts of trauma perpetrated against the individual (emotional/physical), lack of stability for physical needs (food,water,sleep,shelter)


Steve, your best bet long term is to remove yourself from the huge parlay of things that you need to go right, without a set-back and/or a support network that can catch you when something in life inevitably goes array.

Is staying with a family member or long-time friend not an option? These are desperate times and mending bridges to make that happen would be your best bet to gaining real independence and freedom from the bottle and your demons.

family and a program

good luck

 

[stevek]

It's sooo good man

 

[stevek]

yeah with comorbidities of substance abuse and mental illness it's cyclical and at some point what came first ceases to matter as they work in a ying and a yang to support one another. The chicken and egg no longer matter, because it just becomes a fried egg on fried chicken sammie situation.

no situations are identical, there are an infinite range of triggers and etiologies some more biological and some more sociological but near the bottom the worst cases all find shockingly similar environmental situations which then become a new co-vehicle along with the biological dependence and mental illness.

that environment can look different but will mostly contain in some forms: social isolation, regular threats or acts of trauma perpetrated against the individual (emotional/physical), lack of stability for physical needs (food,water,sleep,shelter)


Steve, your best bet long term is to remove yourself from the huge parlay of things that you need to go right, without a set-back and/or a support network that can catch you when something in life inevitably goes array.

Is staying with a family member or long-time friend not an option? These are desperate times and mending bridges to make that happen would be your best bet to gaining real independence and freedom from the bottle and your demons.

family and a program

good luck

Not an option unfortunately

Appreciate the insight though man

 

[Archie]

sorry to hear that.

maybe check out some 12 step meetings in your area.

if nothing else free coffee and pastries and kill an hr or so listening to interesting stories in a warm place

 

[stevek]

Interesting

I love pastries

 

[stevek]

A good night/morning - THE RAIN HAS PASSED. YESH!

Scored an incredible bacon burger with fries from the drunks, along with a Corona and am MLite

Score a backup vape

Scored Caramel popcorn w seasalt

Scored some incredible hazelnut cream chocolates

Scored free tea/coffee

Other stuff too. I'm the luckiest bum in Philly, straight up.

 

[MrX]

Steves, any thought of heading south for the winter?

Winter in Philly sounds like pretty much the worst homeless choice possible.

 

[stevek]

Good thiugh process Mr. X.

I'll seriously mull that over when I get that fukkin Reliacard.

Do you have a specific suggestion?

I'm only getting $522 so as inexpensive as possible. I can work pretty much any kind of job. Just tough to be qualified without a crib.

I do love Philly because if I'm cranked up on booze I can scream and break bottles and shit and the police do not give a fuck, but fuck I'm not getting frost bite again.

FYI crew Steves is fully vaccinated now. At least we accomplished that.

 

[stevek]

I think eventually I will end up in Vegas.

I will hire the darkest, meanest (when I'm a bad boy) hooker (one that knows the game) to be my poker/life coach. She will get a HUGH percentage of my winnings.

If I'm a good boy? She knows the PERFECT amount of drank/drugs to give me, what I love to eat, and just how to make my orgasm time and time as she wishes. I get to please her in every way, witch she knows is all I want all being said and done.

If I'm a bad boy? She straight nightmare. Slut shaming me to the poker players. Giving me so much alcohol I'm sick for days, chained up in her dungeon and she gives me JUST enough to survive.

Paradise or Hell is what she'll give me, no in between.

I'll make it big and we'll be eachother's only "clients".

And NO OTHER DUDES WHEN IM ON THE DUNGEON. NONE. No problem w that at all as I do have very cool gas friends, but yeah not for me.

When I'm a bad boy she can have the Asian fuck the fuck out of me as all the female strippers laugh their asses off, like my home Faith at Delilah's said she could make happen, if it's what I wanted.

Faith - the answer is YES.


💘

PS Keep Melissa away from me. No beef w her, butt just because I loved it when she violently spread my legs like I have a vaj and clit does NOT mean I'm a closet case. I'm just a really sensitive guy. Also my hair WAS that bad that day, so understandable say Melissa. Also sorry I got blasted and called there for you like ten times. It's a strip club! Wtf even?!

My bad.

I just want you and Faith to be so happy forever for how beautiful you really are.

Peace and love, beautifuls.

*sniffle*

❤ 💙 💜 💖

 

[Archie]

need a new thread or get this one re-titled

why not try Charleston South Carolina? play your guitar on the street for all the tourists

 

[Vegas Dave]

need a new thread or get this one re-titled

why not try Charleston South Carolina? play your guitar on the street for all the tourists

Yeah might as well go back to fileting hotties stevey. This thread has been off the rails since post number 3.

 

[stevek]

need a new thread or get this one re-titled

why not try Charleston South Carolina? play your guitar on the street for all the tourists

Hmm

 

[Blitty]

need a new thread or get this one re-titled

why not try Charleston South Carolina? play your guitar on the street for all the tourists

Nashville, Tennessee. People come her to become music movie stars. Guitar friendly too.


That’s what I heard.

 

[stevek]

Hmm

 

[stevek]

THE LEAN IS NASHVILLE

 

[MrMonkey]

Stevie, I really feel bad for you. In posting here I never realized until recently how hard it has become for you. I'm no expert so no real solution coming from me. Not an addicted person so never had a problem shutting down an aspect of my life if necessary.

So what are you medically speaking, bipolar or an alcoholic or ????

 

[stevek]

Don't feel bad MrM! My homeless life is more fun than you think.

Medically I am Bipolar and total alky to drown it out, both run in my family. I've debated Schizo but no hallucinations so they said no to that.

 

[stevek]

I honestly want to he a homeless drug dealer.

I think with my Machiavellian communication abilities, my firm belief in Peace and Love and my love of drugs as well as women I'd be a great fit.

I will be a medium stakes drug dealer that shoots critters out of Blitty's lawn as a past time.