Various messages in the ongoing “Canada Invasion” Signal thread include:
plans to invade Vancouver and Toronto simultaneously, “because they’re right next to each other”
a refusal to include Danielle Smith in the text chain due to the Alberta Premier “being too pick-me”
Vice President JD Vance suggesting the invasion will commence quicker since he learned to forge Trump’s signature
numerous notifications as Chinese cyber-analysts joined and exited the conversation
repeated references to how Elon Musk “smells weird”, followed by cry laughing emojis
repeated unsuccessful attempts to ask ChatGPT to name the president of Canada
A 65-message exchange about who would win in a fight: Chuck Norris or Rambo
national security adviser Mike Waltz asking whether the Canadian Invasion thread should be folded into the larger
“General World Invasion – SUPER SECRET!!!” thread.
Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth sending Marco Rubio on no fewer than 5 beer runs
plans to invoke NATO article 5 to compel Canada to assist in the invasion of Canada
multiple ignored messages from Hanomansing saying “Hi, I’m a journalist from the CBC. Why am I on this thread?”
In response, President Trump told reporters “come on, that’s like the least horrifying thing we’ve accidentally texted out.”
TORONTO - Following reports of Trump Cabinet members including journalists on private Signal threads, Trump officials have reportedly texted similar plans for an invasion of Canada to anchor of CBC's The National, Ian Hanomansing.
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