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Steves gets his life together

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I found this fruity Blistex on the ground in the park and it just came flying out of my pocket in clear view of everyone in Barnes and Noble, where teenage girls come to hang out.

Now THAT'S fucked up.

I need a twisted tea.
 
Meeting w halfway house Steve (yes, same name) set for tomorrow. He was talking new place, chill time, clothes, etc. then job.

I WANT a Job NOW.

He's right though.

It'll be cool.

Then, since I'm rolled to get all my gear back from the po I'll do that, and will look forward to warmth, and a future of continued warmth and success.
 
I've decided to be the booze hookup for the cool kids at Starbucks

Rates will be reasonable Mommy and Daddy won't even notice

The park is right here with plenty of dumpsters around

It's a perfect setup

I owe it to Danny A my highschool booze hookup

Nothing wrong with a case of twisted teas in a garbage bag in a deserted dumpster. Who would suspect?

What happens in Rittenhouse stays in Rittenhouse
 
Whoah boy.

So I bomb a 3rd Twisted Tea, and no sooner do I cross the street than my belt breaks.

Who would've guessed that a guy who's been pounding Ramen and fizzy drinks whilst working out at psycho speed multiple times a day in the park in the same pants/belt could have that happen to him?

I hit a high priced store and the girl tells me to go to a Nordstrom for a better deal. I do and while I'm checking out my pants fall right down to my ankles showing everyone my hospital undie bootie. A cool homegirl laughs then apologizes. I was so shocked I could respond. Laughed after a bit.

Tonight will be a tough one as it's supposed to rain all night. I'm sobering up for now but I have two girly drinks for when I leave Starbucks to help me with at least a portion of that shit, one at ten percent and the other at eight.

Won't be getting my gear back tomorrow as I'm no longer rolled for the Uber and storage.

On the flip side hand rolled cigarettes are a TOTAL WIN.

Can't wait for all this to hopefully at least some degree be over in 24 hours.

Salad.
 
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Just tough in general

Very mixed, we got everything from the hood to the upper class to Chinatown to the Russian

The Espanol are a personal fav, I just find them beautiful and cool. A beautiful Espanol woman makes my jaw drop in awe and the upper class Espanol bring to mind Cartel Netflix shows. I love the Cartel man and I would work for them in a heartbeat given the chance.

Love Asians as well, so smart and quick. Slick.

A sophisticated Asian woman will perform the knot trick on you and it's a deeply beautiful act
 
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Starbucks lady was just arranging coffees and I told her it looks great.

No interest there. She's definitely not looking for a homeless boyfriend.

I can't believe she isn't looking to take me in!

Lets get the next one.
 
We ripped through almost all of our dough in a blur of alcohol, tobacco and prepared frloods/drinks.Amatur hour.

Will likely have to shelter it out with the mean people/thieves.We should NOT have missed halfway house Steve in a drunken blur.Have I learned nothing?!

Soooo much fail. So much.

Hey 46 year old wannabe frat boy Steves -

Mommy and Daddy ain't paying your bills, fuckhead.
 
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Might beg tonight and/or open doors for people

I've begged just a bit and it did go well

Some blessed guy came out of a bar the other night and flipped me $20. I wasn't even begging. Unreal.

I want to deal drugs is the truth. Speed and/or coke.what I love. A little weed.

Am I joking?

Nope.

If I could tone down the drinking or maybe even eliminate it I'd be an incredible low to mid stakes drug dealer, imo.

Last night I smashed my sunglasses in a fit of drunk rage and chucked that Iphone I found into the trash.

Does it get anymore self destructive than starting fights w people that can take you in a heartbeat and destroying, discarding your own shit?

Short of starting fights w the po the answer is NO, imo.
 
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Can't wait for your next threads:

  • Stevie tries murder-for-hire (wherein he proceeds to get drunk with his victim, who steals his gun and shoots him in the nutsack)
  • Stevie acts as a drug mule (wherein he swallows packets of heroin for a Mexican cartel, then drunkenly reveals that fact to a rando skank at the local dive, and ends up tied to a makeshift hospital bed near the border, an empty bottle of Ex-Lax by his side)
  • Stevie goes back to the future (wherein Doc Brown sends him to 2072, and he purchases the 2000-2050 Sports Almanac in a pawn shop, only to shred it in a fit of Twisted Tea rage when he realizes his Flyers still haven't won a Cup by then. He flies back home angry at Flyers management.)
 
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:lmao:

Dude you should be paid for stuff like that.Now, I do admit that I've come across some real fucking scumbags (the EBT thief, the mace in the park thieves and the subway thief), but I've been making soooo many mistakes.

In all seriousness based on my behavior I'm very fortunate to not be dead, crippled, in jail or any combination of the three.

Lets eliminate the mistakes on my end and see what we can do.

I'm sure Rebel Without a Cause is a great movie, but it's no way to live your life
 
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