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Mudcat
So what do you think they are thinking?
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I've done this when taking buses. Thankfully, I haven't been riding them for a while.
It usually happens when the bus is running late, and you don't know if it's gonna come or if Plommer's jerking off somewhere.
Sometimes you're contemplating whether to just start walking. The bus system some places is not that great. Besides, it's not like there's much else to do. Perfectly rational emotional behavior.
 
I do not like mushrooms. I don't like them.

All my life people have wanted me to like mushrooms. I don't know why. I don't care if they like mushrooms.




"Have you tried them?"

"Yes."

"When was the last time?"

"Long fucking time ago."

"How do you know you don't like them now?"

"I know."

"You should try them again."

"What are you, a rep for the International mushroom council?"



People comment when I pick the mushrooms off a pizza.

"You should just eat them. You can't even taste them anyway."

"If they have no taste, why are they such a big fucking cause for you?"



Here. Have a mushroom. Knock yourself out.



images
 
Really? Okay.

I saw a response and I thought for sure it was going to be someone telling me they love mushrooms and they are their favorite thing. That's what happens in my life: people like mushrooms.

People make pro-mushroom statements. I say I don't like mushrooms and they say things like, "Mushrooms are great," which, while it may seem like a simple positive statement on the surface, is actually very argumentative and saying I am just plain wrong. That's the sort of thing I face.

So this was a pleasant surprise.

There have not been a lot of pleasant surprises in my life surrounding mushrooms.
 
Back in 2004 when I joined Cappersmall I had an avatar of a dancing mushroom in the rain. I loved that avatar but to be honest aside from looking childish it very much looked like a penis. My computer crashed and when I loaded everything back I could not locate the dancing mushroom jpeg. I have searched ever since with no luck.

As for real mushrooms I used to sort of like them if they were really small on pizza or in spagetti sauce but as I've gotten older I no longer like them at all.
 
Here's what I am unsure of.

If I am with a male - just me and another guy - maybe shooting some pool or whatever - and the other guy sneezes . . . am I required to say, "Bless you," or, "Gesundheit?"

I was in the situation the other day and I was all set to say, "Bless you," but suddenly I was overcome with a feeling that it would be extremely gay.

Like it's pretty gay to say it even to a woman - what's the point? - but women appreciate and expect it. So I am enough of a pawn to do it.

But with a guy? I felt like it would be tantamount to saying I wanted to perform oral sex on him. I didn't want that at all - no thanks.



I don't need or want guys to say bless you to me and hopefully that's how all guys feel.
 
That "bless you" shit is very gay. I only do it at work with people I don't know well.

Actually, I said it to a stripper at Brass Rail last Sunday after she sneezed inches from my face. She said that she might be allergic to me, to which I replied "Hey! Screw you!", to which she replied "Kidding, I can't be allergic to you, you're cute", and then I rolled my eyes and sent her back to her hustling ways.

So I have more manners than that bitch.
 
Have I said that before, about the gesundheit? Actually I know I have - but in this thread?

This thread is getting long and I am becoming increasingly conscious that I may be repeating myself. I don't like repeating myself. So many random thoughts have also occurred to me at other times. It's inevitable.

This thread needs a curator that I can consult with.
 
I don't know why I think of bless you as gay. It may be fluffy and frou-frou in today's context but it's roots are not gay. They started saying it in the middle ages because plague was a problem and one of the first symptoms was sneezing.

So when people said, "Bless you," or, "Gesundheit," they were basically saying, "Dude, I hope you are not about to drop dead of plague" - which was a real possibility. So the bless you was a very meaningful statement of good wishes.

Buttsex was a completely separate negotiation.



Have I said that before in this thread?
 
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