Hooligans Sportsbook

I want to overshare

  • Start date •
  • Replies
    56 Replies •
  • Views 5,268 Views
Follow
there's an old saying my grandmother used to tell me that translates to, "when you're angry, go pull weeds." not saying you're angry, but the point was to expend some agitated energy doing something useful. doing yardwork helps me when i've got a lot on my mind or in a confused state, just talk it over in my own head while getting some chore done that i've put off. that's about the extent of my sharing other than occasionally bending my neighbor's ear about the troubles of the world, mine and generally speaking.
 
I was going to suggest the same thing Wakky already did.

Can you contact the remaining members of the group somehow?

Since it was shut down from lack of attendance, I assume the people who continued to show up did so mainly because they either felt a connection with someone/people in the group or at least felt that comfortable enough for whatever reason that they were compelled to attend.

Headcase's Advice Nugget #1: Get those people together somehow and start having your own non-Godly meetings outside of the traditional structure of AA.

Follow whatever principles that made you appreciate this group more than others and ditch the fluff.
 
First of all, I'm really sorry that your meeting died. That sucks, probably a lot more than than most of us would realize.

Wally's idea is good if that's the kind of thing you can do. It's probably the first thing that jumps into most of our minds. Make your own meeting, find like-minded people to overshare with again. But, for most people, it would be a more daunting task than it sounds like. I think of all kinds of things I should do to help with my lack-of-close-community issues, and none of them sound too hard, but for some reason, they just are.

So, barring being able to build your own meeting, my gut reaction is that you should go to AA meetings. It's good that you have a lot of them to choose from, right? From what I understand, the different meetings often have pretty varied personalities, and you might find one that fits for you, at least well enough to help.

And again, sorry about your meeting. Ten years is a long time.
 
It seems like you put a lot into your music. That certainly is a creative outlet you could more thoroughly explore. I don't know if the outlet needs to be social but you're very talented, maybe getting some regular gigs in town and such could be a path to something that would make you feel less "squirrelly" or whatever. I am not sure if you need to have an outlet to vent, but to me the biggest release I can get is writing down or even better preforming a song I wrote.
 
Yeah, the idea of putting effort into rekindling or starting a new meeting is not something I haven't thought of. There is a lot of background I don't want to get into. I have been doing service work in the recovery community for 20 years. I know what it takes to make things happen but right now I am worn down. Watching the thing die week-by-week, month-by-month - it has been very depressing. I don't want a leadership role right now.

I appreciate all the support and ideas and there are some good ones which perhaps I will come back to.



I think what I am realizing is I had a specific reason for starting this thread. There is a lot of legitimate stuff I can gripe about relating to that meeting and finances and getting older and job search - I could drag it out for weeks - but there is one thing which is pretty clearly the main thing.

My girlfriend Jenny was diagnosed with a brain tumor a little while back. That's the fucked up thing.

I'm not even going to get into all the medical stuff about it right now.

Anyway, we are not married or even living together - I suppose a lot of guys might think, that could get real messy down the road - get out while the getting is good. But my reaction/decision has been that I am going to stick with her.

That however is a two-way street and she has gotten very touchy and fickle and keeps pushing me away. She has complex issues at least partly due to some serious trauma earlier in her life. What that means, among other things, is it would be very hard for her to be seen getting weaker and showing the vulnerability that may be coming. That would be an extremely difficult intimacy for her. So she finds stupid little things that make no sense and pushes me away.

Again, many guys would say, "Well fine - split then. You're home free."

But I guess that's not who I am. I like her and I really care about her. But it really may be out of my hands. We are in a bit of a tense time right now - and it's entirely possible that she just might dump me for good.



Anyway, there is a lot of stuff between the lines but that is the big thing.
 
Anyone who would tell you to split is someone who is selfish and doesn't understand what it means to love someone or comprehend compassion.

I could go on for hours about the respect I have for you and the many talents and character traits which I find very appealing but this sign of commitment shines above all else.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.