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CaliGirl's Match.com Escapades

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MonkeyF0cker
Haha. I wouldn't doubt it and that's sad. There's another huge fairy tale. The happily ever after story.
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I thought about that when Cali mentioned settling. We all settle somehow. Even those that consider themselves in a basically happy relationship. You're either compromising on things that you're willing to trade on for whatever reason or you feel you've snagged someone so much higher than you on the ladder that you're left settling for a relationship where you constantly worry the person is going to wake up one day and walk out on you. One big settlefest. Unless you're in a movie of course.
 
Oksana
I thought about that when Cali mentioned settling. We all settle somehow. Even those that consider themselves in a basically happy relationship. You're either compromising on things that you're willing to trade on for whatever reason or you feel you've snagged someone so much higher than you on the ladder that you're left settling for a relationship where you constantly worry the person is going to wake up one day and walk out on you. One big settlefest. Unless you're in a movie of course.
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Absolutely. That's why I'm perfectly content in meaningless flings.

But who knows. Maybe, you eventually find a person that complements you in most aspects of life...
 
MonkeyF0cker
If it's karma in our lifetime, I'd definitely say no. There are tons of people who get ahead by shitting all over other people.

If it's some sort of afterlife ascension, it's hard to say. I don't get the point if that's the case though. Put us here for some sort of test? Why? Seems pretty pointless.
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True there are alot of ppl who get ahead by shitting over others. However to think that all doesnt equal out in the end is misgiving because we have a habit of judging that only of which we see but what of that we dont know of? Im sure those same ppl pay for their shitting on others by being shat on themselves to some degree. that could be in a spiritual or emotional sense etc.. All because we dont know about it or didnt see/hear about it doesnt mean to say it didnt happen.
Thing with alot of adult humans is that their front is solid but alot of the time what lies underneath the veil is someone who is fractured in some form. I deal with alot of corporate clients and most of them (esp with the introduction of alcohol into the system) are arrogant arseholes. Tells me they are unhappy deep down...
 
xpansive
Tell ur friend he's a buzzkill :) If u dont believe in karma then how would you define as explanation to the scenario of your personal story in previous thread?
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That cycle started with my getting involved with a guy, then going out and leading other guys on while still pining over my ex, then getting involved in another relationship with a guy, and then hurting people again. So if karma somehow existed there, I think it would've ended with my having my heart broken or something similar. Or it wouldn't have started at all unless I was getting paid back for something completely unrelated. Instead, it all ended with me hurting more people while I escaped again. That's one reason I don't believe in karma - where does it start? Do we set off a chain reaction from the time we're old enough to control our actions and speak? Or is it just a case by case basis?
 
xpansive
True there are alot of ppl who get ahead by shitting over others. However to think that all doesnt equal out in the end is misgiving because we have a habit of judging that only of which we see but what of that we dont know of? Im sure those same ppl pay for their shitting on others by being shat on themselves to some degree. that could be in a spiritual or emotional sense etc.. All because we dont know about it or didnt see/hear about it doesnt mean to say it didnt happen.
Thing with alot of adult humans is that their front is solid but alot of the time what lies underneath the veil is someone who is fractured in some form. I deal with alot of corporate clients and most of them (esp with the introduction of alcohol into the system) are arrogant arseholes. Tells me they are unhappy deep down...
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I think everyone has problems that they have to deal with, but I don't think they are really attributed to karma. If people are cunning enough, they can literally get away with murder.
 
Oksana
That cycle started with my getting involved with a guy, then going out and leading other guys on while still pining over my ex, then getting involved in another relationship with a guy, and then hurting people again. So if karma somehow existed there, I think it would've ended with my having my heart broken or something similar. Or it wouldn't have started at all unless I was getting paid back for something completely unrelated. Instead, it all ended with me hurting more people while I escaped again. That's one reason I don't believe in karma - where does it start? Do we set off a chain reaction from the time we're old enough to control our actions and speak? Or is it just a case by case basis?
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And who determines the punishment? And why did they put us here with merely an implied structure of right and wrong only to cast judgment on us in the event that we cross one of those boundaries with no clarity? It just doesn't make much sense to me.
 
Oksana
That cycle started with my getting involved with a guy, then going out and leading other guys on while still pining over my ex, then getting involved in another relationship with a guy, and then hurting people again. So if karma somehow existed there, I think it would've ended with my having my heart broken or something similar. Or it wouldn't have started at all unless I was getting paid back for something completely unrelated. Instead, it all ended with me hurting more people while I escaped again. That's one reason I don't believe in karma - where does it start? Do we set off a chain reaction from the time we're old enough to control our actions and speak? Or is it just a case by case basis?
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Well it kinda starts with what we're taught when at a young and impressionable age where we're supposed to be taught the difference between right and wrong. Thats the 'ideal' of course. If being strict id say it started when u began flirting with others guys whilst already being hooked up (u did it for a reason cos if u were happy and satisifed at that time with ur partner it wouldnt have happened). Again im being uber strict here and dont carry such strict beliefs myself...Just using this to try and illustrate a point

Karma aspect being u werent being true to yourself at the time and one can only push down these things 4 so long b4 the chain reaction from our subconscious takes over and reminds you of where its at. Although when u said that "Instead, it all ended with me hurting more people while I escaped again" indicates you chose not to listen to that little voice inside at that time and thus the chain reaction continued...One of the most difficult things is to change that of which we do not identify with. NOTE: Im in no way in a position to judge you here. Thats not me. Just an opinion is all so plz dont be offended :) .
 
MonkeyF0cker
I think everyone has problems that they have to deal with, but I don't think they are really attributed to karma. If people are cunning enough, they can literally get away with murder.
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Wish i could argue that but what of someone like OJ simpson (as an example)? Was that karma or just a series of random events thats landed him where he's at now?
 
no xpy, I didn't flirt with people while in a relationship. I was talking about what Cali's going through now - I went out and dated people after my relationship ended. But I still wasn't over my ex so I was giving those new guys false hope about what my intentions were - even though at times I believed I could just will myself to want to be with someone new. If karma existed, then maybe I would've finally committed myself to one of these guys I was unintentionally leading on only to have them tell me to take a hike and break my heart. Instead I hurt some of them and then one day it just dawned on me that I was doing to others the same thing I was upset with my ex for doing to me - not taking their feelings into consideration. So if anything I was the bad one in the end who didn't get punished at all. Some of those guys got hurt and I learned something about how I need to be hyper-aware of what my true intentions are in dating situations. And to not date at all until I'm over someone as it's just not fair to the other person involved. Where's the karma for the time filler guys?
 
Oksana
no xpy, I didn't flirt with people while in a relationship. I was talking about what Cali's going through now - I went out and dated people after my relationship ended. But I still wasn't over my ex so I was giving those new guys false hope about what my intentions were - even though at times I believed I could just will myself to want to be with someone new. If karma existed, then maybe I would've finally committed myself to one of these guys I was unintentionally leading on only to have them tell me to take a hike and break my heart. Instead I hurt some of them and then one day it just dawned on me that I was doing to others the same thing I was upset with my ex for doing to me - not taking their feelings into consideration. So if anything I was the bad one in the end who didn't get punished at all. Some of those guys got hurt and I learned something about how I need to be hyper-aware of what my true intentions are in dating situations. And to not date at all until I'm over someone as it's just not fair to the other person involved. Where's the karma for the time filler guys?
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My bad Oksy. Thought u were in a R'ship at the time....Ty youve made me rethink the balance of this entire subject. Plus my misinterpretation didnt help :) U able to provide a timeframe for this moving u speak of? Cos from what i recall youve been planning this 4 around 12 months or so...
 
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