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he was diagonosed last yr with it,
this yr it has gone to another level, out of control, on the verge of getting kicked out of school
the ODD description fits the situation perfectly, along with the causes for it.
at my wits end now, getting him some professional help cause nothing I've tried works.
 
mmike032
he was diagonosed last yr with it,
this yr it has gone to another level, out of control, on the verge of getting kicked out of school
the ODD description fits the situation perfectly, along with the causes for it.
at my wits end now, getting him some professional help cause nothing I've tried works.
Click to expand...

you are dealing with a splintered marriage right?

I don't know the situation exactly... but having the primary caregivers split is a BIG DEAL for kids..... bigger than it is for adults, because as adults we have some semblance of control..... kids... they are at our mercy..... if the kids hear/see fighting just on a verbal level it really hits deep...... if they see even feigned physical violence.... like plates thrown.... doors slammed..... pushing ect.... that takes it up a few notches.......if police get called..... especially if handcuffs and removal of a party occurs..... that is huge.....


its not rocket science, kids are vulnerable..... they have a hard to dealing with shit that is hard dealing with (as a adults)

the question is.... what is the solution/cure?

there isn't one... not a quick one...

kids need lots of safe relationships, where they don't feel their allegience is determining outcomes.... they need ways to vent....verbally, physically, ect without repercussions...


this is why I don't like diagnosis at a young age.... I don't like the idea of a troubled kid coming into an office and needing to talk, and a "professsional" just checking things off her list to achieve a diagnosis..... like the kid is a puzzle to solve and not a human that needs to be looked at, listened to, and maybe even hugged...
 
Archie
you are dealing with a splintered marriage right?

I don't know the situation exactly... but having the primary caregivers split is a BIG DEAL for kids..... bigger than it is for adults, because as adults we have some semblance of control..... kids... they are at our mercy..... if the kids hear/see fighting just on a verbal level it really hits deep...... if they see even feigned physical violence.... like plates thrown.... doors slammed..... pushing ect.... that takes it up a few notches.......if police get called..... especially if handcuffs and removal of a party occurs..... that is huge.....


its not rocket science, kids are vulnerable..... they have a hard to dealing with shit that is hard dealing with (as a adults)

the question is.... what is the solution/cure?

there isn't one... not a quick one...

kids need lots of safe relationships, where they don't feel their allegience is determining outcomes.... they need ways to vent....verbally, physically, ect without repercussions...


this is why I don't like diagnosis at a young age.... I don't like the idea of a troubled kid coming into an office and needing to talk, and a "professsional" just checking things off her list to achieve a diagnosis..... like the kid is a puzzle to solve and not a human that needs to be looked at, listened to, and maybe even hugged...
Click to expand...

Sharp post, Archie
 
Arch, it started yrs ago, I think alot of it was due to his mom and seeing some of the stuff he seen.
the divorce is making it worse no doubt. but I think having someone else for him to vent to besides family would be better.
and learning how to deal w/ his anger instead of lashing out at everyone and bucking any kind of authority.
 
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