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Vegas Lesson #72408: Don't try to give coke to strippers at the Rhino

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But you DID leave the strip club under SECURITY's strong advisory, correct?
Click to expand...

Yep. That's what I figured.

:lol:

MF sooo crazeee! He don't respect no stinky po-lice! But the little doggy don't yap so much to strip club bouncers. Jeezus.

Chihuahua_Barking-300x201.jpg
 
MonkeyF0cker
Condensed version: After about 3 hours of being there...

A girl approached me and started the general stripper conversation.

STRIPPER
So where are you from?

ME
I live in Las Vegas.

STRIPPER
What do yo do?

ME
Fuck strippers.

Stripper giggles uncomfortably. Me takes pleasure in making STRIPPER even more uncomfortable.

STRIPPER
I've had nothing but Mexicans and Indians today. It's good to talk to a white guy.

ME
I'm Mexican.

STRIPPER
Really?

ME
No.

STRIPPER
They're so cheap. Look at that group over there. They aren't spend any money.

ME
Yeah. They suck.

STRIPPER
I'm just trying to party. They just want everything for free.

ME
You're trying to party?

STRIPPER
Yeah. You wanna do a Las Vegas bomb with me?

ME
What's a Las Vegas bomb?

STRIPPER
I don't know but it's good.

ME
(to bartender)
Can I get two Las Vegas bombs?

BARTENDER
Sure. That'll be $28.

Me hands the bartender $35 and the bartender slides two Las Vegas bombs over to STRIPPER and ME. ME slams the Las Vegas bomb reluctantly.

ME
Jesus. That hurts. I guess I've done too many lines tonight.

STRIPPER
Really? I'd love a line. Can I have some?

ME
Yeah. Sure.

STRIPPER
Come with me to the bathroom.

ME
Ok. How are we gonna do this?

STRIPPER
Just come with me.

STRIPPER grabs ME's hand and guides him to the bathroom.

ME
Well... Wait for me. I'm gonna have to go chop some off.

STRIPPER
Just give me the bag. I'll bring it right back out.

ME
I have too much. I'll break some off and bring it out to you. I'll be right back.

STRIPPER
Just give me the bag. I'll be right out.

ME
Umm. Hold on a second.

ME enters the bathroom, goes into a stall and busts out a few lines worth of cocaine into his cigarette celophane. There is a bit of muttering outside of the bathroom that includes STRIPPER's voice and an unknown male. ME exits the stall and the bathroom. SECURITY stands outside of the bathroom entrance.

SECURITY
Sir, you'll have to come with me. You're leaving.

ME
For what?

SECURITY
We have a zero tolerance for drugs here.

ME
Drugs?

SECURITY
If you'd like me to search you, I will.

ME
Whatever.

ME follows SECURITY to the entrance and exits the building.
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Fuck Strippers. You handled yourself well.
 
MonkeyF0cker
You do realize that the most that a strip club security guard can do is call the police, right? Okay. I might have thought you were stupid for a second.
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Point?

You became a pawn to a lowly second-rate bouncer.

But don't worry, we both know that if that oaf laid a single finger on you, you would've whupped his ass. After all, it's not size that matters :up:
 
Bread
Point?

You became a pawn to a lowly second-rate bouncer.

But don't worry, we both know that if that oaf laid a single finger on you, you would've whupped his ass. After all, it's not size that matters :up:
Click to expand...

Wow. Grasping at straws much? LOL. Impotent.

It's probably not a good idea to stick around after they call the cops when you have an 8-ball in your pocket. I guess you are stupid.
 
MonkeyF0cker
Wow. Grasping at straws much? LOL. Impotent.

It's probably not a good idea to stick around after they call the cops when you have an 8-ball in your pocket. I guess you are stupid.
Click to expand...

He never called the cops though. You should've flexed some of that Munkyfucker muscle and jetted.

That'll be the day a bouncer talks down to me and I comply. LOL. What a chump? I reckon this is the way you react to all your altercations though (in person).

Common. You're better than this.

Chihuahua_Barking-300x201.jpg
 
Today's magic word: Impotent.

Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

:moped:



Why did you let that useless SECURITY guy walk you out like that? And you followed like such a little bitch/pawn.

Surely someone as non-compliant to our pawnish society as yourself plans better for these occasions?

Chihuahua_Barking-300x201.jpg
 
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