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UFC 109: Old Balls!!

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Live from Mandalay Bay on Saturday night, it’s UFC 109: Relentless. Or as I like to call it, UFC 109: Who Gives A F#$@?? OK, I give a hoot, but there are many who are not impressed with this card. I get it. Whenever the two fighters in your featured headliner’s combined age reaches almost triple digits, there might be some backlash. But money is money. And I aims to get me some of it.

Randy Couture -410
Mark Coleman +330


Couture (17-10-0) is 46 years old. Coleman (16-9-0) is 45. There should be signs posted inside of the Octagon for this one reading “Beware Low-Flying Testicles.” Unreal.

Couture continues his torrid pace, appearing in his 3rd fight in only six months. We all know that Randy is a freak of nature and in remarkable shape for a fossil, but this rapid schedule is ridiculous. In his last meeting against a fellow legendary old-timer, he and Big Nog put on quite a show. If things go my way, this one will be a lot more yawn-inducing. That’s right; I’m going with a Coleman ground and pound decision. Call me crazy.

Coleman looks like a walking steroid. The man is huge. If he can weather Couture’s striking long enough to maneuver some takedowns, he will be able to do what he does best – wear down his opponent via attrition to the face. He is a large dog for a reason – Couture is a beast, even at this age. But this line is way off in my opinion, and I feel that Coleman absolutely has a shot here.

Exclusive Footage of Couture-Coleman Fight!

Matt Serra -140
Frank Trigg +120


Ever since Serra’s (16-6-0) alarming knockout of Georges St-Pierre, he is 0-2 (St-Pierre, Matt Hughes). Of course this proves what everyone already knew – Serra’s championship was a complete fluke. Does he still belong in the UFC? I think so. He’s a competitive middle tier type of guy. But does Frank Trigg (19-7-0) belong in the UFC? Hmmmm…

In his two go-rounds in the big leagues, Trigg holds a combined 2-4 record. In his one fight back in this latest stint, he became just another highlight reel victim for Josh Koscheck. I see nothing that leads me to believe that this guy will be in the UFC after this fight.

The highlight for Trigg was his quote about Serra. “When he does not get his own way he acts like a spoiled child, and as with all spoiled children, I will spank him early and often.” That’s actually pretty funny, but I feel more confident about Serra here than anything else on the card.

Serra is a winner in life
serra2.jpg

Mike Swick -225
Paulo Thiago +185


Mike Swick (14-3-0) was on quite a roll before hooking up with Dan Hardy recently. The lanky scrapper is looking to get back on track against Brazil’s Paulo Thiago (12-1-0). I labored long and hard on this one, but in the end, I like what I’ve seen from Thiago, and have to take a shot on him at plus money.

It seems like Swick has been around forever, and I am certainly a fan of his style. For Thiago, taking out a top name like Swick could move him past being known simply as the guy who came out of nowhere to KO Koscheck. But more importantly, it would put a smile on my face. And I like that. :laugh:

Rob Emerson -120
Phillipe Nover +100


If there is a God of Comedy out there, please let him get this fight on the air. I NEEEED this, mannnn!

Dana White has loved both of these guys for some reason ever since they appeared on The Ultimate Fighter. Neither has ever shown any promise. This will most assuredly be the end of the road for one of these underachievers, so I guess that should add some intrigue.

Nover (6-2-1) is 0-2 in the UFC. I still get warm fuzzy feelings thinking about Efrain Escudero tossing him all around the ring as a significantly favored fighter. Then there is Rob Emerson (10-8-1, 1 NC).

Emerson has also lost two straight, and I’m really not sure what aspect of his game is supposed to be his strong point. He doesn’t even have a decent stare down. Nothing. So who the hell do you take here?

I’m taking Emerson. The way I see it, zero is always going to be greater than negative one. But don’t sweat this one out too much. Just sit back and enjoy. I know I will.

Ali-Frazier. Manning-Brady. Emerson-Nover.
emerson.jpg


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Nice write-up.

Against you on Serra just because I cannot stand that fucking guy.

I am on Emerson. Read a few things about him, including an article in my local paper where he has been working with BJ Penn and his trainers. So my money is on my local. I do disagree about you thinking this fight will be comedy. Emerson's last couple of fights have been very entertaining. I am hoping we get to see this fight as I think it will be enjoyable to watch.

No other plays for me yet.
 
I don't necessarily disagree with you on the Couture line, but you seem to imply that Coleman would be the better suited in a grappling contest. I realize Coleman has an impressive wrestling pedigree, but Couture's matches or even surpasses it. In fact, I'm pretty sure the two have spent a lot of time training together over the years. Either way, if it goes to the ground I'd expect Couture to be more effective there as well.
 
thing with emerson is he tends to fade late in fights, never really trusted the guys dedication to the sport, definitely think nover will be able to secure the takedown early and often. agree with the rest of your picks. Buchholz line is way off imo, Danzig should only be around a -160 fav, height and reach advantage should be a huge factor in the fight, 5 plays for tomorrow, probably look to add on to Thiago if Justin comes up short

Justin Buchholz +220 x2 - +300 x3
Chris Tuchscherer -128 x2
Phillipe Nover -105 x1
Matt Serra -165 x1
Paulo Thiago +170 x.5
 
Obviously Couture is -400+ for a reason. I'm not throwing out "locks" or any such nonsense. Just saying that I think Coleman has just about as good a shot at taking this fight down, imposing his mass and will, and grind out a victory.

Nothing better than hitting a plus 300 dog in the fights. Gets your cock hard.
 
HOFF"S Breakdown of the Headliner

MARK COLEMAN +315
RANDY COUTURE -415

The headliner of UFC 109 looks like a fight over prescription medication at the geriatric ward of a hospital. Randy Couture (17-10) and his 46 year old liver spotted hands will be tangling with Mark Coleman (16-9) and his 45 year old prosthetic hip. Excitement be damned in this wrestling/stalling match of the year. Two past their prime fighters will head into the octagon hoping that neither will die from a heart attack or old age while in the cage.

Coleman has no skill besides wrestling, and to make things worse, Couture's is better. Coleman has no cardio. Coleman has no business still fighting. Couture doesn't have much business fighting either but he is at least still capable. There is absolutely no value in Couture's line, but there might be a little in Coleman's line. I'm looking for Couture to grind out two rounds and wear Coleman down by smothering him against the cage like a fat man smothers a cake. Then when Coleman's cardio begins to fail like his kidneys, Couture can maybe, just maybe finish this fight.
COUTURE INSIDE THE DISTANCE +242
 
Well look who I found! Illy told me u guys where hiding out over here! I've been away for a bit, missed whatever went down but glad to find out ur still posting somewhere. Looks like we are thinking along the same lines....hopefully thats a good thing!!! GIMME MONEY TO BLOW ON SUPERBOWL PROPS!!!!!!!