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I agree with this letter to Bill Simmons

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A letter to ESPN's Bill Simmons from his mailbag today. :lmao:


Q: Wanna know why sabermetrics still hasn't caught on with some baseball fans? Some of us hook up with girls. Do I think Ryan Howard is the best hitter in baseball because he gets 140 RBIs every year? No, but he's a damn good first baseman and I don't need some nerd running lab experiments to tell me so. I'd rather spend my time drinking beers in the parking lot and shouting obscenities in Spanish at passing Mets fans. That's what baseball's all about. If I wanted to do math and science I wouldn't be watching baseball.
 
Q: So I'm in the grocery store the other night buying ramen noodles 'cause that's literally the only thing I can afford to eat. Right after I had put the fourth huge case into my cart, a really cute girl approaches me and says, "Wow, that's a lot of ramen." For whatever reason, my immediate response is, "Yeah, I'm buying it for a local food drive for the homeless." Wouldn't you know it, but the girl finds this extremley sexy for some reason, and we continue to talk for a few minutes. Eventually, I ask her out, and we decide she will come to my place for dinner and a movie later on this week. What in the hell am I supposed to do? I have no money and a kitchen full of ramen noodles that are supposed to be for some mysterious food drive. Your thoughts?
-- Shane, Baltimore


:rofl:
 
Q: So I'm in the grocery store the other night buying ramen noodles 'cause that's literally the only thing I can afford to eat. Right after I had put the fourth huge case into my cart, a really cute girl approaches me and says, "Wow, that's a lot of ramen." For whatever reason, my immediate response is, "Yeah, I'm buying it for a local food drive for the homeless." Wouldn't you know it, but the girl finds this extremley sexy for some reason, and we continue to talk for a few minutes. Eventually, I ask her out, and we decide she will come to my place for dinner and a movie later on this week. What in the hell am I supposed to do? I have no money and a kitchen full of ramen noodles that are supposed to be for some mysterious food drive. Your thoughts?
-- Shane, Baltimore


:rofl:

holy hell, :lolpanda:
 
I literally just read that 12 seconds ago.

Simmons gets dumber every year. Used to love his stuff. Or perhaps I'm just so out of touch with American culture that I don't understand half of his jokes anymore.
 
I literally just read that 12 seconds ago.

Simmons gets dumber every year. Used to love his stuff. Or perhaps I'm just so out of touch with American culture that I don't understand half of his jokes anymore.

I started readiing Simmons in the late 90's when he was writing for a small Boston Web Site. Over the past couple of year his stuff has gone down hill. It use to be must read material, now I might read a column once ever few months.
 
I don't listen to any of his podcasts, and that's his favorite thing now. I really don't give a shit about the NBA and he writes about it a ton.

But when he busts out the mailbags or other random shit, it's still top notch in my book. His recap of the Shaq roast will go down as an all-time favorite.