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Thread: Best Pussy Eating Story

  1. #1
    Phoning It In Daily Casperwaits's Avatar
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    Default Best Pussy Eating Story

    Dated this negro chick when I was in my early 20's. She was a personal trainer who had a thing for white boys. The guy she dated before he was the bassist for Biohazard, so I knew I had to man up if I was going to survive.

    her and I didn't waste time getting physical. First time we made out was downstairs in a bar on 17th and Broadway. I bring this up because she ended up falling off of a stool and had to be helped up the stairs and to the hospital to be checked out for a busted ankle.

    Anyway, one night we were at her studio apartment and were getting cozy. She had this cat that was more possessive than any animal I had ever been around. This cat just did not like me. So here I am doing what all men should do. I start going down on her. About 5 minutes into the act, I feel something jump on my head. I don't stop eating pussy., because you don't stop unless you are on fire or someone is committing a home invasion. She took the cat and threw it across the room. 2 or 3 minutes later I feel the cat jump on my head again. Now I am still not stopping because she is in full swing and I am having WAY to much fun. Dumb cat gets tossed across the room AGAIN.

    Third time wasn't a charm for this cat. Cat jumped on my head and this time she decided to use claws to make her point. Well let me tell you, I don't care how important pussy is. If you have a cat digging into your skull, you freak. I not only freaked, but my head and mouth violently shook. My pussy eating moment went from enjoyment to pain for everyone involved. Needless to say, she did not complete, I did not complete and the damn cat was stuck in the bathroom where it meowed for the rest of the night. To this day I will not eat pussy if pussy is around.
    Quote Originally Posted by CaliGirlNJ View Post
    Casper is a fucking idiot. if he procreates i will drown drug the girl carrying the child and give her a forced abortion to save the baby from a horrid life. and i'd be applauded from saving the world from another him.

  2. #2

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    Quote Originally Posted by Casperwaits View Post
    Dated this negro chick when I was in my early 20's.


    Honestly stopped reading after that.
    Quote Originally Posted by Matty View Post
    One is usually oblivious to Fiver's stealthy binge-drinking.

    Boys you've never seen anything like it.

  3. #3

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    Strange story.
    "Superwhat!" I'm sorry, if your going to throw the word Superdrum into your band's name, you better be the best damn drummers in that crowd. I was expecting "super-drumming", and was excited about hearing some "super-drumming". Then, they play this mediocre, depressing, satanic, industrial music. ...at a world-wide prayer for peace festival. I was a bit upset...

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by fiveteamer View Post


    Honestly stopped reading after that.
    lol

  5. #5

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    Would rather eat dirty white ass than clean black pussy I'm not even joking
    Quote Originally Posted by Matty View Post
    One is usually oblivious to Fiver's stealthy binge-drinking.

    Boys you've never seen anything like it.

  6. #6
    Phoning It In Daily Casperwaits's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fiveteamer View Post


    Honestly stopped reading after that.
    You can change the race if you want Teamer.
    Quote Originally Posted by CaliGirlNJ View Post
    Casper is a fucking idiot. if he procreates i will drown drug the girl carrying the child and give her a forced abortion to save the baby from a horrid life. and i'd be applauded from saving the world from another him.

  7. #7
    Phoning It In Daily Casperwaits's Avatar
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    I wanted you guys to post your best story. That was the idea of the thread.
    Quote Originally Posted by CaliGirlNJ View Post
    Casper is a fucking idiot. if he procreates i will drown drug the girl carrying the child and give her a forced abortion to save the baby from a horrid life. and i'd be applauded from saving the world from another him.

  8. #8

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    Oh ok.

    Once when I was drunk a girl I know was resisting of my taking her panties off so I ripped them off anyway and made her cum.

    The end.
    Quote Originally Posted by Matty View Post
    One is usually oblivious to Fiver's stealthy binge-drinking.

    Boys you've never seen anything like it.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by fiveteamer View Post
    Oh ok.

    Once when I was drunk a girl I know was resisting of my taking her panties off so I ripped them off anyway and made her cum.

    The end.

  10. #10
    Phoning It In Daily Casperwaits's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fiveteamer View Post
    Oh ok.

    Once when I was drunk a girl I know was resisting of my taking her panties off so I ripped them off anyway and made her cum.

    The end.
    You know you throw a couple of "ooh babies" and "fuck me stud" into that post and you could be writing for Penthouse Forum.
    Quote Originally Posted by CaliGirlNJ View Post
    Casper is a fucking idiot. if he procreates i will drown drug the girl carrying the child and give her a forced abortion to save the baby from a horrid life. and i'd be applauded from saving the world from another him.

  11. #11

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    There was a split second where I thought that this might not be consensual. It was pretty cool.
    Quote Originally Posted by Matty View Post
    One is usually oblivious to Fiver's stealthy binge-drinking.

    Boys you've never seen anything like it.

  12. #12

    Default

    .
    Quote Originally Posted by Saulty View Post
    Shut the fuck up people.
    Quote Originally Posted by camilion15728 View Post
    Shut up Steve.

  13. #13

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    Quote Originally Posted by fiveteamer View Post


    Honestly stopped reading after that.
    I seriously LOL'd


  14. #14

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    Quote Originally Posted by fiveteamer View Post
    Would rather eat dirty white ass than clean black pussy I'm not even joking
    ahahahah omg. teamer thats so wrong

  15. #15

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    So anyway this Canadian prick, plommer, really got under my skin before about the whole going down thing.

    I addressed it but my whole post got wiped out because this laptop sucks the fat one. I hope Bill Gates dies in a single car rollover out in the middle of the desert.


    There is nothing hotter than going down on a hot, sexy little thing who's ready.

    I will usually slide my body along side hers and inevitably she'll tug my Hugo Boss underwear down and next thing you know were involved in some hot, modified sixty nine action.


    Going down is awesome foreplay. Plommer, you lose again. #winning

  16. #16

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    pretty funny joke, bread

  17. #17

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    Quote Originally Posted by Daft View Post
    So anyway this Canadian prick, plommer, really got under my skin before about the whole going down thing.

    Going down is awesome foreplay. Plommer, you lose again. #winning
    Daft, if Plommer gets under your skin Plommer wins.

    What the fuck is wrong with you, pal?

    Common.

  18. #18
    Big Beautiful Balls stevek174's Avatar
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    Default

    I once was going down on a woman who had a huge unkempt bush and I was lost in it like a huge forest I couldn't see or do anything except search for the holy clitoris i had no idea it was coming but a chipmunk came out of nowhere behind me ran straight up my ass, through my digestive tract and up my esophagus and right as it was getting ready to come leaping out of my mouth I found the holy clitoris through the trees and we munch on it together then she got excited closed her legs and we both pass out in a suffocating world of darkness, hair and sweat so I took a shower and took the chipmunk out to breakfast

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