A Farewell to Football

Welcome back, weekends. I missed you.

With the Super Bowl’s final whistle each year, I snap out of a hypnotic trance. Football is over, and I just fell into a giant pile of free time. A vacation away from Hail Marys and halfbacks may sound dreadful for many, but for some like me, it is a welcomed break. It’s a time to spend Saturdays and Sundays with someone besides Tim Tebow, Ray Lewis and Brett Favre. It’s a time to do something outdoors. A time to pay attention to your significant other.

OK I’m sure that Favre will still infiltrate your world with his annual retirement circus, but that’s to be expected.

Fear not. It will be back before you know it. By the time the NFL preseason starts to roll around, the time apart will have most of us salivating for a taste of pigskin action. But don’t rush it. Take a deep breath and enjoy the absence of goal line fumbles. No more missed extra points. No more incompetent refs. They’re all gone for awhile, which can only add to your life expectancy.

It was one hell of a going out party as the Saints upset the Colts, and sent the city of New Orleans into an explosive celebration in the process. Hopefully you were on the right side, or at least hit half or more of your 100 Prop bets. It was great to see that pouty face plastered all over Peyton Manning’s gigantic melon. I enjoyed it thoroughly.

LOL! WAH!

The books have already named Indy as a favorite to reign victorious next year, with New Orleans heavily favored as well. If you’re the kind of player who likes to invest in Futures this early, be sure to line shop as those prices will vary quite a bit. (Indy – Greek +825, 5dimes +750, Bodog +650 / New Orleans – Greek +1015, 5dimes +750, Bodog +500). These variations will impact your bottom line quite a bit should you actually hit a winner for once in your life.

But there I go talking about football again. Silly me. College hoops are starting to switch into gear and the grind that is the baseball season will get under way shortly after that. The jubilation of triumph – and the pain from which it is forged – will not be lost just because football is gone. There will always be something. Hell, can you bet on the Winter Olympics? Too far? Probably, but who cares. Give me the max on the Latvian luge team please.

Before I even know it, the same vultures that hit me up every single year, will be begging me to join their Fantasy Football leagues. And why not? The Detroit Lions title drought ain’t nuthin’ compared to the last time I won a Fantasy championship. Add Fantasy Football to the list of things that I won’t miss for the next few months.

So if you’ve got the gridiron blues, I feel for you. My sanity, my peace of mind and my marriage welcome the time off. I even regain several lost weeknights that would be spent paying attention to mostly uneventful matchups between schools like Marshall-Tulane. It’s sad because it’s true, but don’t judge like you weren’t spending your Wednesday nights watching those crappy games as well. Such is the life.

Besides, with a real manly competition to bet on just getting started (American Idol), who needs football? Yeah I said it, and I’d say it again! I’ll see all you tough guys next season. I’ll be over here trying to make a buck on gay crooners and pimply-faced teenagers.




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